How many people will tell you when you’re not being a team player? When your attitudes and behaviours are draining people ? When you’re not leading with conviction or giving hazy feedback?
All of these fall under the purview of soft skills.
Back in school, we had a subject called moral science. Having studied in a catholic institution, I know first hand that the catholic boys had it far tougher — their moral science equivalent was a subject called catechism which was actually tough.
Moral science was more of a joke. The marks we got (I still don’t know how moral science was graded) were irrelevant to the larger scheme of things.
In hindsight, though I don’t remember a thing of what was in those moral science books, I feel that those were probably some very important lessons that we didn’t pay attention to.
During childhood, our parents narrated stories from mythology with the idea of imbibing life lessons and values in us.
Be Honest.
Be Kind.
Be helpful.
Treat people with respect.
Pride comes before fall.
Most of these lessons translate to soft skills in the real world.
When you miss a target, make a mistake or lose a business, there is no shortage of people who will jump to point out your error and hold you accountable.
But how many people will tell you when you’re not being a team player? When your attitudes and behaviours are draining people around you? When you’re not leading with conviction or giving hazy feedback?
All of these fall under the purview of soft skills.
The dictionary defines soft skills as:
noun: personal attributes that enable someone to interact effectively and harmoniously with other people.
Soft skills are a constant work in progress. Personally, I have struggled tremendously in this area. I used to lash out, go into a shell when I felt threatened and hold myself back because of numerous unfounded fears. It took me a long time to realise that these were self-defeating behaviours that had held me back and halted my progress.
At the same time, it’s very easy to realise the lack of soft skills in another person. Rudeness, indifference, apathy, petty politics — all of these are easily identifiable in others but not in ourselves. We seldom analyse the impact that we are having on others with our actions and behaviours and even if we do, we are fearful of acknowledging it.
There is no such thing as mastering soft-skills. And no easy way but to ask for honest feedback to realise how you fare in that area.
Soft Skills. They’re hard to cultivate and improve.
It’s possible to be successful without soft skills.
But it’s hard to be fulfilled and happy without them.
